A Wish for Ears That Don't Work

(At least for this week.)

In a list of things I don’t like, loud and/or surprising noises rank quite high. In fact I would place that somewhere in between being chased by villagers wielding kitchen utensils and watching Gong Show marathons on TVLand. Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy making loud noises just as much as the next stampeding pachyderm, but I am also quite easily startled – a trait that I hate – and loud/surprising noises certainly tend to aggravate this condition. I like to attribute any success I had as a high-jumper in high school to the great deal of practice I had in the standing/sitting jumping “out of my skin” category while growing up. (As long as I’m on the subject, let me state for the record that I really am not a fan of persons of the male persuasion who think it’s just a riot to come up and tickle me when my back is turned. I realize that it may seem like fun for all, since it causes me to display my 20-foot vertical leap and squeak like a mouse on steroids, but trust me, only you are amused.)

Well, I have now reached the second paragraph where I explain to you the inspiration for writing the first. (Must have something to do with loud noise, right? Probably at work? – Wow, you’re good.) My office is currently in the process of having some major remodeling work done, but only on one side of the floor, so my side of the floor continues business as usual in medias res la Armageddon. You may think I’m being melodramic, but that’s because you here to hear jackhammers and “Shoot” *loud blast*, “Shoot” *loud blast* at intermittent intervals umpteen times throughout the day. If I had any nerves left, this craziness would certainly be getting on them. Hopefully the demolition phase will be finished soon, but until then please don’t mind me if I seem a bit pancake-like. I’ve had to peel myself off the ceiling entirely too many times today.