Amelia Earhart was a childhood hero of mine. Of course by childhood, I refer to a period of time that stretched well into my early twenties...but I'm growing up now.

Monday, July 19, 2004

Things You Should Not Show People

(Or if you do, give sufficient warning)
Four examples of the above title:
CASE #1: There are some people in life that seem to be huge magnets for gruesome, though generally minor, injuries. For some inexplicable reason these people have an amazing talent of showing these injuries to others. I say talent rather than tendency, because I for one try really hard not to see these sorts of things (I’m the type of person who anti-rubbernecks at an accident scene – this means I’m trying so hard not look in the direction of the mangled cars that I’ve almost caused an accident looking in the opposite direction of all the other drivers.) So, it takes a cunning person to make me take an upclose look at their wound. This is how it generally goes: friend or acquaintance in question approaches me or a group that I am standing in. The person’s thumb and index finger are poised at the corner of the large bandage as they begin the phrase, “Hey wanna see what I did this weekend?” and by the time the last word is out of their mouth they have ripped off the bandage revealing their prize for hazardous, clumsy and/or stupid behavior. A variation on this tactic is the woundee who has recently lost a black toenail and is walking around in flip flops waiting for the right opportunity to go “Hey look” while sticking their foot in their friend’s face. I want to make it clear that I don’t love people any less that do this sort of thing, but I think you can see why it fits in the above-mentioned category.
CASE #2: This one I have been guilty of myself on several previous occasions, and used to do so on purpose. In the past year I have tried to control it, and with the exception of a few accidental exhibitions have done a fairly good job. What am I alluding to so elusively? Showing people what kind of underwear you have on while still wearing pants. Nuf’ said.
CASE #3: Your Britney Spears memorabilia collection. (I had to learn this one the hard way).
CASE #4: The link below shows the picture that spawned today’s blog entry. Prepare yourself before clicking it, it isn’t pretty. But it makes me wonder how many people are going to be flocking to donate when this is the image used on the promotional webpage. I donate fairly regularly, but seeing this made me physically ill. Maybe I’m just a wimp.


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